This time of year challenges me on many levels. This fall, my beloved Carmelita is taking her time exiting this Earthly plane, and her long nights have left me feeling very overtired, contributing to my sadness. Like you, I also feel the weight of the political climate, natural disasters, and global unrest.

The antidote throughout the last couple of months has been to embrace the art of savoring. Even I have to admit that fall is the perfect time for this mindfulness practice. The abundant harvest is here, yet a killing frost looms near. New England trees reach their peak color as garden flowers like asters and zinnias have their final hours. Yet, poet Robert Frost reminds us that “nothing gold can stay.” So, I invite you to pause with me and honor the art of savoring as a means to counter impending loss.

Fall Slowing & The Art of Savoring

“Many people are alive, but don’t touch the miracle of being alive.”

— Thich Nhat Hanh

The Art of Savoring

Savoring is defined as a mindful appreciation and enhancement of positive experiences in life. Some people I know who adore the fall season slip into savoring naturally. My friend Kim relishes the cool temperature on her skin. Instead of lamenting the early morning darkness, my sister-in-law Patty embraces each new day with a ritual: she lights a candle as she sips her morning coffee and gets ready for work. Lines at Starbucks for pumpkin spice lattes show the masses longing to savor the flavors of the season.

Since I tend to resist the fall and most everything about it, I must choose intentional savoring. I need to deliberately connect with my senses and surroundings, seeking out the things that bring me pleasure and that I want to hold dear. To resist is to block what is happening within and around us; to savor is to embrace a state of awareness and alertness to our surroundings and what fulfills us. Leaning into savoring helps override the negativity bias to which we as a species are predisposed. It fosters resilience and deepens our connection to others and the world, ultimately leading to greater life satisfaction. Plenty of scientific and positive psychology research from the 80’s through present supports the benefits of this art.

Why Savoring Is Good for Our Wellbeing

1.Mindfulness and Presence – Savoring is a mindfulness practice. Engaging in savoring enhances our skill of mindfulness, leading to greater awareness and emotional regulation.

2. Increased Happiness and Life Satisfaction – Studies show that savoring positive experiences correlates with higher levels of happiness and overall life satisfaction. Individuals who actively savor moments report greater joy and contentment.

3. Enhanced Positive Emotions – Research indicates that savoring amplifies and prolongs positive emotions. Taking time to reflect on and enjoy good experiences heightens feelings of joy, gratitude, and excitement, allowing these feelings to linger and benefit us longer.

4. Stress Reduction – Savoring has been linked to lower stress levels. Engaging in savoring can buffer against negative emotions like depression, hopelessness and anxiety. Doesn’t it makes sense that allowing ourselves to bask in a positive experience can help keep negativity at bay?

5. Improved Relationships – Sharing and savoring experiences with others can strengthen social bonds and enhance relationship satisfaction. Research suggests that communal savoring, where individuals share joy, fosters closeness and connection.

6. Greater Resilience – Savoring helps build emotional resilience and can serve as a coping strategy. Those who regularly practice savoring are better equipped to handle challenges and setbacks, drawing on positive memories to bolster their mood.

7. Physical Health Benefits – Some studies suggest that the positive emotions associated with savoring may have beneficial effects on physical health, boosting immune function and lowering the risk of chronic illnesses.

Savoring In Action

Savoring is an art that begins with, and resides in, our senses. A favorite meditation teacher, Tara Brach, writes, “Consciously inhabiting our physical being is the gateway to full aliveness.” Can you linger with your sense of sight, smell, touch, taste, and hearing to bask, marvel, luxuriate, or appreciate? The Buddha said, “As you walk and eat and travel, be where you are. Otherwise, you will miss most of your life.” As with all things mindful, noticing is the first step.

However, the art of savoring requires not just awareness, but a deliberate pause. When you’re in something good – a sip, an embrace, a beautiful setting – slow your roll; stay there with all your senses alive and engaged. I have been marveling at my roses this season, but it’s not good enough to stop and smell the rose. We must give ourselves over to the rose wholly. Pause, remain there, explore that rose with all of our senses. Linger in all that the rose is connected to and reminds us of. Make a memory of the rose – its smell along with its texture, its movement in the breeze, its placement in the garden – so that in the dead of winter, we may revisit the velvety rose and its aroma and remember that it will bloom once again. Let the external sensory experience give way to an internal journey.

When I recently took time to look at old photos of Carmelita, I was reminded of a whole chapter of life filled with raising young children: numerous hikes, trips to Maine, family vacations on the Bass River of Cape Cod, and fall afternoons on the sidelines of flag football games. A whole era of family life arose as I sat in awe and gratitude of a good life lived.

As I sit here now with Carmelita at my side, I stroke her velvety ears and imprint the sensation in my psyche, where it will remain forever. This softness also reminds me of hugging my grandmother, Libby. Toward the end of her life, I lingered a little longer with each hug, smelling her Jontue perfume and feeling the soft peachy fuzz of her cheek against mine. When I choose to, I can recall her scent and the precise way we embraced cheek to cheek. I am grateful that I savored those moments, and I carry that comfort within me always.

Every Moment of Every Day Presents a Savoring Opportunity, Try These:

Mindful Eating: Enjoy seasonal foods. Slow down and focus on flavors, textures, and aromas.

Time in Nature: Appreciate the changing leaves and the beauty around you. Listen to the crunch of leaves, feel the cool breeze, and take in the colors. Maybe sit and draw or write about what you see; creating art helps us savor.

Gratitude Journaling or Letters: Note moments of joy and gratitude. As you write, fully immerse yourself in the feelings and lock them into your memory and physiology. Alternatively, linger in gratitude by writing a letter of appreciation to someone. We did this in my Mindful Choices class recently; I’m popping my letter in the mail today.

Share Experiences: Create or discuss experiences with friends and family as you recall shared moments and reflect on their significance, remembering all the sensory details.

Create Rituals: Establish seasonal rituals—like reading in a cozy nook with a matcha or taking a long, luxurious bath as the cold approaches.

The Dark Side of Savoring

Of course, everything has a potential dark side. The flip side of savoring might be wallowing. Prolonged attention to an experience may lead to the surfacing of negative feelings like regret, jealousy, or grief also associated with the experience. Further, if we dwell in savoring for too long, we risk becoming stuck and inactive. (I am guilty of this.) And as we know, forward movement is necessary for growth and change, it’s our destiny as human beings. As I ponder the dark side of savoring, I’m reminded of a favorite quote from author E.B. White:

I agree, yet sometimes our own thoughts and feelings can dampen savoring. We might dismiss the practice as silly or unworthy of our time, or we may believe we ourselves are unworthy of steeping ourselves in goodness.

Embracing Savoring

As I embrace this fall, rather than resist it, I feel awakened to light and color and connected to the cycles of all living things. I am savoring the still green ferns that refuse to brown, the lengthening shadows from a lowering sun, the ticker-tape of falling oak, maple, and aspen leaves, walking long golden paths with my man and dogs, and the geese in formation overhead honking see you, see you, see you. These past 16 years with Carmelita have been a gift, but the last two months of learning to savor and celebrate her have changed me in ways I cannot yet fully express. It has much to do with learning the art of savoring, the enhanced quality of our time together, and being deliberate, an act challenging for us all in modern life. Yet if we can embrace some savoring, we can increase our happiness and well being. We can bolster ourselves for loss and for the long winter ahead.

Whether it’s a great meal, a moment of peace or pleasure, a burst of excitement, a beautiful dream, or a common everyday object – now is the time to stand still and practicing savoring. You might start by writing a list of things that bring you joy or pleasure. Go through the list and create experiences, or simply use your imagination to visualize savoring. Perhaps as you move through the week, choose some things to savor with intention and see if it doesn’t make life just a little sweeter.

With love, light, and fall flavored lattes (if that’s your jam),

Jess